Dennis Miller: San Francisco Still Lets You Circumcise Your Goldfish
BILL O'REILLY, HOST:Now, talking about the nanny state. San Francisco is like the nanny state of all time, and they don't want gold fish -- goldfish, cut adorable goldfish -- within the city limits, Miller. What is this all about?
DENNIS MILLER: What's next after goldfish? Cheetos, Pringles, then Funions? Then the whole thing comes down around their head. Oh, those sort of goldfish. Sorry, Billy. I had it wrong. I thought it was the snack.
Listen, San Francisco is going to hell in a hand basket. You can't circumcise up there. You can't go to McDonald's and "super size." You can't criticize. All you can do is romanticize about their urge to fanaticize. That's what's happening up there. They've got so open minded, pretty soon, you're going to have Mussolini hanging down from the Golden Gate with the crows pecking out his eyes, for God's sakes.
Once again, stay out of it. How did they get involved in all of this? Thankfully...
O'REILLY: From what I understand, the city council of San Francisco believes that the marketing of golffish is cruel, because they remove the goldfish from the water, and they put it in a tank. And that is -- you can't. The goldfish wants to be free. Wasn't there a movie about goldfish going free? Wasn't that about...
MILLER: I remember that. I remember that. There was a beautiful song with that, too. And I think the chorus was blurb, blurb, blurb.
Listen, goldfish might not even want to live in San Francisco right now. It's such an uptight, whiny place, OK. I mean, thankfully, I did read today in a story in the San Francisco Chronicle, you can still circumcise a goldfish in San Francisco. And if you've ever seen that, the mohel comes in, and he's tiny. He's got frogmen gear and he uses an X-Acto knife. It's a pretty holy ceremony, Billy.
O'REILLY: But you know what? You know that the tragedy of all of this is?
MILLER: What is the tragedy?
O'REILLY: The homeless goldfish in San Francisco.
MILLER: Exactly. Exactly.
What about -- what about the midget hoarder golffish? Who's going to think for them?
O'REILLY: And the transgender goldfish.
Crows As Pets - News
we weren't able to provide all of the things that our pets needed, all of the time. The behavior of our pets was a reflection of what was missing in their lives, and when problems surfaced, we knew that ultimately we were to blame.
They've got so open minded, pretty soon, you're going to have Mussolini hanging down from the Golden Gate with the crows pecking out his eyes, for God's sakes. Once again, stay out of it. How did they get involved in all of this? Thankfully.
Emaciated and with bare patches in its fur from being pecked at by crows, the vet later discovered the cat also had a pellet lodged in her forehead, suggesting she had been shot at point-blank range. After the story ran in The Journal, the clinic was
Crows. Field mice and other vermin. 7. Seasonal Distress. Just because your cat has a fur coat does not mean your pet should be out in the winter cold. Cats in need of water have been known to lick frozen things (like metal pipes) and in turn,
Man saves turtle from crows: 7300 block, Den Meade Ave., Fort Washington, May 27. A man reported holding a turtle he had found on the side of the road with crows pecking at it. An animal control officer picked up a healthy green turtle and returned it
The Crow: The Most Intelligent – The Most Useful?
Crows possess remarkable brain-power although few people realise just how smart these animals can be.
They can fashion tools without any prior instruction. In Israel the Wild hooded crow has learned how to catch fish by using crumbs as bait. They possess amazing memories and can recognise individual people even after having not seen them for several years.
New Caledonian CrowsWhen it comes to constructing tools, the New Caledonian Crow leads the way. This bird is regarded by scientists as the only animal besides humans who modifies tools that they have created. These birds have been observed making tools out of objects that they have never encountered before. Such as fastening wires into hooks.
Caledonian crows are also one of the few animals that use tools to gather other tools to achieve a purpose, usually the retrieval of food. Once such experiment that demonstrated this to great effect was conducted by Gavin Hunt and a team of researchers at the University of Auckland, New Zealand.
The experiment consisted of two boxes. One contained food while the other a long stick. In addition, the crows were also given a shorter stick. To reach the food the crows had to use the short stick to retrieve the long stick.
Out of the seven crows who were given the task, six completed it successfully at the very first attempt.
Relationship With PeopleCrows, like parrots, can imitate sounds and have been taught to speak words and phrases. Some people even keep crows as pets.
Crows are often hunted and shot by people. In the United States there is a hunting season but crows can be killed if they are causing a nuisance or have been constituted as a health hazard. In the UK crows are also considered a pest and they can be shot after obtaining licences under certain conditions.
Crows could find themselves enjoying a more rewarding relationship with people as more of us discover just how intelligent these creatures truly are. However, the true seismic shift will probably occur when we realise how useful they can be to us.
Crows As Pets - Bookshelf
Cage and garden birds
CROWS AS PETS A miserable black creature sits under a tree, its beak wide open : a carrion crow has fallen out of its nest and is now at the mercy of any ...Some Canadian birds
Young crows make interesting pets and often learn to repeat words and phrases. Many people wrongly believe that splitting the tongue will enable a crow to ...A pioneer outline history of northwestern Pennsylvania
Crows as pets are intensely funny." Crow A crow can be taught to talk. It is said by bird students that crows have a language ...Crows
If you think that having a pet crow might be fun, you should know that it is illegal to keep crows or other wild birds as pets. Scientists who capture young ...Scouting
This high intelligence makes crows interesting, amusing pets. ... I know a woman in North Carolina who has a pet crow with at least a 12-word vocabulary. ...Day-to-day Guide Directory
Where can I get a pet Crow or Raven?
Before you decide you want a crow or raven as a pet, please ask yourself why you want one. ... There are a few more sources for people looking for pet crows and ravens. ...
Birds Crows
Birds are very interesting creatures. They are vertebrates, because like fish, amphibians, ... Gouldian finches are one of the more popular breeds of finches kept as pets. ...
Ralph, an Unforgettable Pet Crow: A Native of Michigan ...
In the early 1950s, a boy raised a crow as a pet - a pet that lived up to all the intriguing stories we hear about crows. Bill Bennett shares his memories of Ralph.
Should crows be pets? | The Daily Tail | Dog & Cat Stories
Take a look at this picture of a crow flying. This crow could be a pet. Take a look at this pet crow taking a bath in an apartment in
Crow Pet Bowl | Buy Crow Pet Bowls for Dogs & Cats - CafePress
Find many crow designs on Pet Bowls for Dogs & Cats. Personalize your own or find your favorite design. Many cute & fun designs available.